nc-17 | sexual content

The needle doesn't even really hurt.

You smile at me and it's as if you never left. You gave me the same kind of smile on our wedding day. I was so nervous. And I was mad at you for not being nervous. You were so calm and collected that it made me want to slap you.

You scribbled down somewhere that this is just like Sammy. Just like Sammy.

But Sammy was a liar. A thief. A con man. You figured that out. That's how you got your promotion.

The needle doesn't even really hurt.

I'd know if you were lying to me. I would. I know you.

Last night you made love to me, and for a moment, I thought you were back. You groaned into my neck and you called out my name and it was just like it was before this happened.

Then you rolled over and closed your eyes, and when you opened them, you had forgotten that we made love.

You figured it out. You were naked; I was naked. Our bodies were sweaty. I was panting and caressing my breasts. My nipples were still hard. When you rolled over to look at me, I smiled. I'm sure my face was flushed. But one glimpse of your eyes, and I knew. You had already forgotten.

The needle doesn't even really hurt.

You love me. I know this like I know my own name.

And I'd do anything for you. I want to help you. I want to make you well. And if I just try hard enough, maybe I'll succeed.

Hiding the food didn't work. Leaving you alone for hours at a time didn't work. But maybe this will.

I know you love me.

The needle doesn't even really hurt.

And even if it doesn't...

I'm a weak woman, Lenny. I've tried to be strong. I've tried so hard.

But I don't think I can do this anymore.

It's aggravating. I know this isn't your fault, but dammit, Lenny, it's aggravating. I tell you things, but you don't remember. It took months before we could even condition you to remember that you had this damn condition.

Before you could remember that I was...

This is my fault, isn't it? Is that what you think? If only I hadn't gotten up to go to the bathroom. If only I had managed to fight them off myself. If only I was stronger.

But I'm not, Lenny.

I'm sorry, Lenny. Maybe if I tell you that enough times, you'll remember.

The needle doesn't even...